Mulling over Mrs. X

I'm at work, it's lunchtime....but here I am, my mind is still furiously trying to work out some kind of answer to the problem before me. I'm thinking about the lady who came in just now, Mrs. X, whose eviction case is due for an appeal some time next week. She's now homeless, frightened, tired and looks like she could use a good night's sleep. She cant get any shelter for tonight because the homeless hostels say she's not classified as a "priority need" (not pregnant, not ill, no children, not mentally unstable)....she can't afford to rent a place, she's walking the streets with her life's belongings in 2 plastic bags. I'm frustrated at the system. What do you mean she's not a priority need? She IS a pritority need because she's HUMAN. Doesn't that count for something? But against the bureaucracy, there's nothing much I can do except try ringing helpline numbers to see if anyone can take her in for a couple of nights.

I've rung them all, and I've gotten the same answer. "She's not a priority need. We have to give shelter to those with children, those who are ill....etc etc." I know. I know they're right, and that the waiting lists for shelter is long. It's almost the end of September and it's going to start getting colder....I'm finding it so hard to detach. There has got to be somewhere....

In my heart, I wish so badly that I could ask her to come back to mine, but I simply cannot. If I do, I may lose my job. I can't get involved with a client that way....I have to do my best for them while at work, and when work is over, I have to go home and detach. I'm finding it so hard to look her in the eye and say "I'm so sorry....but...." I'm in turmoil but my colleague has just told me I will be seeing this on an everyday scale and I have to be strong. I have to be strong if I am truly to help them, because after Mrs. X, there will be another, and another....and another. "It's not wrong to care; we all do. But you have to preserve yourself, your sanity and your heart, for your next client too. You will learn with time." I nod and say I understand. But my heart is still in pieces.

"Lord, please send someone her way. Please send someone her way tonight, that she can have somewhere to go to." That's about all I can do now. Pray. And when I have the money, the first thing I'm going to do is build a free for all homeless shelter. Or at least fight for one to be built. You mark my words.